Alex Trebek opened up to ABC News about his continuing battle with Stage IV pancreatic cancer.

In an interview, the Jeopardy! host said, “There was one day a few weeks ago when [my wife] Jeanie asked me in the morning, ‘How do you feel?’ And I said, ‘I feel like I wanna die.’ It was that bad.”

Trebek continued saying, “I apologize to her and explain that it has nothing to do with my love for her or my feelings for her. It just has to do with the fact that I feel like I’m a terrible burden to her, and that bothers me tremendously.”

Trebek said he has gotten good at “faking” how he feels. He said, “There have been tough moments. And I don’t know what it is, but when it’s time to go, it’s time to go. Let’s do it. Get out there, suck it up, make it happen.”